I am Personally Offering Pres. Bush a Dodgeball Scholarship To HFCC

In this weekend's cultural insult, I found one skill that I had overlooked in our often maligned Commander-In-Chief...His Mad SKILZ dodging things. He has dodged the Vietnam War, impeachment, etc. but this weekend he showed his cat-like speed and reflexes dodging that shoe.


We need him on the HFCC dodgeball team. Maybe can just enroll in a few classes and get an associates in HVAC or criminal justice. If he joins the team and enrolls for an associates in religious studies, I will personally pay a full ride scholarship to Henry Ford Community College. So, come on, Mr. President...we are waiting.

The Hawks fall to the Cardinals

Usually in nature the hawk, as a bird, is stronger than the cardinal. Cardinals are Hawk food. This was not the case, however, in Saginaw yesterday with the new Henry Ford Community College Club Dodgeball team.

The Saginaw Valley State University varsity dodgeball team (#3 nationally) handily defeated the HFCC team 16-0. The loss will, however, will still get the Hawks in the Top 10 in national rankings. Because some of the conference teams do not begin in earnest until after the first of the year, HFCC will be ranked above THE Ohio State University during the holiday break.

In this 50 minute game (two 25 minute halves), the Hawks performed diligently. The hard work of the past month and a half was apparent; if not by the score then surely by their spirit. The Hawks fielded a 14 person team while SVSU had the allowed 15 person team.

The Hawks line up for their first ever collegiate game.

Playing at this noted disadvantage was not visible during a half a dozen points when the HFCC team had dwindled the active SVSU roster to a handful of strikers (a feat for any first year team). However, when it came down to three on three or five on five, the SVSU team's years of experience and continuity was clear. With a little more experience the Hawks are sure to pull out a win before the end of the season.

SVSU's own teammates made this observation during the game. "This is your first game?" confusingly asked one of the players, "We got beat 17-0 our first game out and we didn't look half this good."

Another player commented, "If you guys play this well with half the teams in our league, you are sure to beat about 4 of them or so."

All in all, the 2.5 hour trip (in the Michigan snow) to Saginaw was a good experience for the HFCC team. They got to see what an NCDA game is like as well as learn of some of the shortcomings of playing college CLUB sports.

"Their refs were they're freakin' players," commented one HFCC Assistant Captain. "How can you ref a game when you are playing the next point?" asked another HFCC teammate.

There were a few questions during the game about the involvement of SVSU fans in illegally returning balls to their field of play. This was handled quickly by SVSU and ceased (making play more balanced). There were also players on both sides who were consistently stepping out of bounds and not leaving the field of play after legitimately being hit with the ball. All of these things could have been avoided with more staff for the game.

Shaken, but not destroyed, the Hawks line up for another point.

"It is a problem for the conference to figure out," stated HFCC's coach. "If the NCDA (the National College Dodgeball Association) wants to be legitimate they need to batten down the hatches on officiating and requiring conference teams to adhere to the conference rules."

"The problem is the financing for these things. These club teams are on a bootstrap budget, but there needs to be ways to get proper refs, ball returners, etc. If and when we host a game at HFCC, I'll find a way to get the refs and staff needed even if I have to take it from my own pocket."

The Hawks have more opportunities for that first win in the months to come. They have taken on a healthy first year season. An invitation to the Michigan Dodgeball Cup as well as possible games with #1 ranked Grand Valley State University and Michigan State University are examples of the calibre of teams HFCC has set its sights on. If they do pull out a win before the Nationals in April, the Henry Ford Community College Hawks would be the first college dodgeball club in the NCDA to win a game in their first season.

NEW DODGEBALL PAGE!

So, the Henry Ford Community College Dodgeball Team is ready to go. We have a new website (you can check it out HERE).

We are also gearing up for our first game Saturday. We are taking on nationally ranked No. #3 Saginaw Valley State University (yes, there is a collegiate dodgeball conference). Even if we loose we will still get a ranking (some teams, like Ohio State, do not begin their season until Winter). It's a win-win situation. So, we'll at least go into the holidays with a ranking - YEA!

I think the guys and gals on the team will do well. They have worked hard at practice for the past two months (on Friday nights, I might add). I have the utmost faith in them that they can pull out a win. GO HAWKS!!!